Day 5. The last day of diving, which was relieving because the whole thing had been so exhausting. The first dive was again at 6:00 AM and I was cold and tired. Knowing I had to go down 30 meters was scary and I didn’t want the dive to begin. I went to get a wetsuit early to have a newer one and pulled the tight black rubbery thing around my skin, then slung the rest of the equipment on. We swam around the coral and way sooner than I expected we were on a sandy patch 27 meters underwater. I hadn’t noticed the descent, which was comforting and I didn’t feel much different from 5 meters to 27. At least the pressure mostly affects the ears only 10 meters deep so they were fine too.
One curious silver flat fish which was about a foot long and half foot high swam around us inspecting the new creatures in its environment. The instructor cracked open an egg and because of the pressure the white had sucked itself around the yoke that it appeared to be in cling wrap and was unbreakable. It felt like a mini rubbery stress ball. After we passed it around the curious fish got to have an unusual snack. Then we had to take a narc test in case the nitrogen was affecting us and making us high or “narced” I had to point at numbers in order on a chart and after each touch my nose. No one in the group was narced.
The second dive of the day after breakfast was a fun dive and Hendrik and I got the camera this time since we missed our turn and we took lots of pictures, and saw a sting ray which was exciting. It went well except that Hendrik almost ran out of air which was bad since I missed his signal for ascent, but it wasn’t a big deal because we were just doing our safety stop and we were close to the surface but it still gave me a scare.
I was sad that our last dive wasn’t a fun dive but we wanted to get certified as an adventure diver and therefore had to pass a navigation course. In between our two dives we had to learn how to use a compass underwater. We had a lesson while the ship was moving which was terrible since I felt incredibly nauseas because it wasn’t the best weather and the sea was quite choppy. I took a pill but would have still enjoyed being in the fresh air and looking at the horizon. I said I understood everything even though I really hadn’t paid attention at all since my stomach had taken all my attention. After the lesson I went outside ASAP and Hendrik explained what I needed to do with the compass underwater, which was very easy.
I had to use the compass to swim in a straight line and Hendrik had to count 30 kicks and then I had to make a 180 and go back to where we came from. Then we would switch rolls and make a square in the same fashion. It was very easy and everyone accomplished the task during the dive. Then we explored the reef a bit more and I got to pet a huge turtle which was the last animal I really wanted to see because I had already seen nemo, a shark, a sting ray, and lastly I wanted a turtle to make diving complete. The only thing I didn’t see which I had wanted to was Dory. Then it was time to get back on the small boat and endure another long bouncy wet journey back to Cairns.
We went out for dinner with our diving class mates that night and had a go at salsa dancing which the lessons I took were of no help since I’m hopeless in rhythm.

As a whole I was really glad I made it through the week and got certified, because diving was something I’d always wanted to experience but I can’t say it was super amazing. Many people found it freeing but I found the opposite. I felt constrained. Constrained to a computer and air supply which I checked obsessively, and constrained by props that weren’t natural like a mask, flippers, wetsuit, and silence. I found the underwater to be eerily silent. Also the air was so dry it would dry up my mouth making it uncomfortable. It wasn’t as spectacular as I thought it would be but I would do it again, definitely especially since I would only have fun dives now since I’m certified. I also think that a nice saltwater aquarium might bring me more pleasure, but that’ll be another investment.

Day 4. I spent the night being rocked back and forth, sliding around on the plastic mattress counting fish, hundreds of them. I still couldn’t fall asleep. I was tired, but the newness of it all would not let me sleep. I was wide awake when the wake up knock came around at 5:45 and sprung out of bed. I didn’t particularly want to go diving at 6:00 AM but I definitely didn’t want to roll around in bed anymore either.
I put on my bathing suit and went to the cafeteria to have a cup of gross instant coffee and a banana. Soon after I was again putting on a wetsuit and tank, for the first dive of the day which is also the deepest. Hendrik and I would have to prefect the out-of-air drill, but other than that it was supposed to be a fun dive. This time we did it well, especially since we had gone over it verbally five times.
During breakfast the ship moved to change location so we could see a new reef and I began to feel incredibly nauseous and worried that I’d have to miss our “graduation dive” when we got our certifications and were filmed by a cameraman. I couldn’t finish breakfast and took a pill, which in a matter of minutes made me feel better, and then I was ready to dive again.
During the second dive we were supposed to do things for the camera and we would take off our mask and put sunglasses on instead and “drink” from a beer can. We got our IDs underwater and got it all on film.
Then it was lunchtime and a bit longer break in-between dives. Underwater cameras were also available for rent and our group decided to rent one and then share it. Since we were certified now we would go alone just with our buddy and therefore were also able to take a camera. We were to have the camera first.
I was excited to finally not be in a group and play follow the leader, though it is good to go with someone who knows the site so they can point out a lot of cool things such as Nemo, giant clams, an octopus, a lionfish, and a cuttlefish which our instructor did before and which I knew I probably wouldn’t find myself.
Hendrik and I went down with another buddy pair because we were going to take pictures of each other and then they were going to give us the camera. So they had it first and as we were descending they disappeared. It’s amazing how fast and easy it is to lose someone in the ocean.  They were right behind us and when I turned around again they were gone. We wondered if we should resurface, but opted against it since we were each others buddies and only needed to take are of each other. I really enjoyed the dive, being able to go wherever I pleased. We even saw a shark. It was only a reef shark because large sharks don’t live near the reef, and they are harmless, but it was still spectacular. We could have resurfaced closer to the boat, but we didn’t know how to navigate, but the swim back wasn’t too bad anyway.
When we were reunited with the others we learned that one of them had trouble equalizing and needed to go back up. I was glad I wasn’t the only one who had problems with it. Then it was dinner and right after was the ever anticipated night dive. Everyone said that every diver needs to do at least one night dive and that it is supposed to be really cool. We were lectured about new hand signals and devices such as a flashlight, glow stick, and inflatable neon orange safety sausage, (that I really wanted to use) in case we needed to be found floating on the dark waters. We were told we’d see fish hunting and sparks in the water created by some sort of sea life. I was skeptical about it, not liking the dark too much, but after hearing about it, it sounded really exciting.
I was unable to get a newer wetsuit and had to settle for an older one, which turned out to be terrible because I started shivering right away after I descended. Before I even descended I had a small panic attack that my regulator was upside down and would intake water which really scared me, but it ended up being fine. I was also pretty tired since that was the fourth dive and the minute I was under I wanted it to be over. It was dark, and a flashlight only allows for minimal visibility. I had to tell myself over and over again to relax because I felt so uncomfortable and was shivering which was a bad sign and meant I should stop the dive. I knew the dive was only supposed to be a maximum of 30 minutes so I would bear it.
The whole time I saw only one fish, and that one fish ate a smaller fish once. I’d seen that in my aquarium when an angel fish that actually just looked like a smaller version of the one in the ocean ate a baby molly. I was not impressed. I kept looking at my pressure gage because by 50 I was supposed to have surfaced and I was down to 70, but just then we got the signal from the instructor to surface, which was very relieving, because I would have had to inform him that my oxygen was low. Instead someone else had ran out of oxygen before me, which made me glad since the instructor said that it was a record short night dive because it was only 20 minutes, though I felt that it was an hour.
When I reached the boat I was shaking and shivering and struggled to get out of the water, I was beat. It was the most disappointing dive, and I learned that the ocean pretty much sleeps at night and that there is nothing to see.   I don’t think I’ll go on a night dive again, but I had to do it if I wanted to get certified to be able to go underwater 30 meters.  Right now I could only go 18.
Tomorrow, we were going to go down 30 meters first thing in the morning to become 30 meters certified and I was not looking forward to that at all especially after this dive. I went to bed soon after because I was incredibly tired and was finally able to go to sleep even through the rocking because I was just so exhausted.

To see more pictures visit: Photos

Day 3. Today was going to be the first time diving in the ocean on the Great Barrier Reef. First we had to be transported from Cairns to a bigger live-aboard boat, since we were going to spend 2 nights on the boat. I had a package of sea-sick pills with me, which I’m really glad I bought before the trip. I took one before the departure since I still did not trust my stomach even though I am usually fine on small boats. It took two hours to get to the reef which surprised me since I thought Cairns was practically sitting on the reef. The waves were rough, and the boat swayed hard from left to right soaking everyone on board. The journey was too cramped and too long and by the end of it more than half the passengers were standing in the back staring out onto the horizon with their pale faces.

When we arrived to the big boat we were given our rooms, lunch, and then it was time for the first dive. Getting ready was the same as in the pool but when I stepped into the water it was salt and not chlorine I tasted and that’s when my nerves started. Thoughts about not being able to equalize, not being able to breath, or not being able to do the skills in the ocean ran through my mind and I began to feel panicked.

Once we were all in the water we were to begin the decent. Since it was our first time we were supposed to hang on to a rope which attached the boat to a huge cement block. We all lined up along the rope with our buddies and let the air out of our BC to descend. The rope was slimy and green but I clung to it as if it would somehow save me. Very slowly I moved my hands down the rope equalizing at every inch. When my ears bothered me I’d inch upwards again, and I did this a few times. The bottom arrived sooner than I expected and we kneeled in a semi circle around the instructor as we had in the pool but now we were on a patch of sand. We did our skills for the last time for the instructor because this was our test we had to pass to get certified. Once in a while a fish would distract me but I managed to do everything well and then it was time to go back to the surface. Ascending is easier since you don’t have to equalize, but it has to be done slowly, 9 meters a minute to be exact. When my head broke the surface I was relieved, and felt comforted breathing air not from a tube.

I thought it was over but we had more tests on the surface such as removing and fastening the weight belt in the water. I didn’t know the point of this exercise since if I was to take off the weight belt I would drop it and therefore couldn’t put it back on. The problem was my belt was even heavier than it was in the pool and shorter, meaning I had no slack to grasp to buckle it. I did panic a bit thinking I’d drop the belt to the bottom of the ocean, since it is very heavy to hold, or that I plain and simple wouldn’t be able to put it on again. After some time of struggling I managed to buckle it around my waist again. Then we had to take off the BC and put it back on, but that was easy and I could do it with no problem.

I was definitely glad when I was back on the boat and relieved of all the heavy equipment, but knew I’d be back in the water sooner than I necessarily wanted to.

I was a bit more relaxed during the second dive. We sank into the water without the aid of a rope which was more calming than crawling down the rope, and this time we did some sight seeing of the coral world. The only thing I could hear is the wheezing sound of breathing through my regulator and the bubbles which then formed as I exhaled. It can either be a very calming or nerve wreaking sound. We played follow the leader with our instructor and saw magnificently colored fish and sea life. I loved looking at all the creatures but couldn’t help feeling that I was just inside an aquarium exhibit and not in the vast ocean.

Near the end of the dive we had to do one more skill before we could be certified and that was sharing air in case your buddy ran out. I was paired with Hendrik and we did everything well, hand signals and me giving him my spare regulator correctly. Then as we slowly ascended together with linked arms and we nearly reached the top Hendrik decided he was done and let go and blew up his BC with air from the tank, forgetting that he was supposed to be out of air and with the aid of using me as a flotation device he was supposed to blow up his BC with his mouth. So we failed the bit and had to do it the next day again. I didn’t let him live that one down.

After the second dive I was totally exhausted and didn’t know how I was going to manage four dives the next day. That night we filled in our dive log books and went to bed early, since our first dive was at 6 in the morning. I felt ill as the bed swayed on the waves and had to take another pill which was like magic. The pills were the only reason I survived that trip. I didn’t sleep too much however since I have trouble sleeping in new environments especially if those environments move.

Day 2.

It’s bad that I’m on day two and I’m halfway through the trip, but anyway. The next morning I felt better, not too much, but I wasn’t throwing up anymore. I didn’t want to go SCUBA diving but I didn’t want to lose money when I’d paid for diving already or spend 4 days in Cairns doing nothing even less. Plus there was no way Hendrik was letting me out of this one. I ate one slice of raisin toast and took another one for lunch. Luckily we first had a classroom session during which we learned about calculating how long and how deep you’re allowed to stay under the water. The precautions have to be taken because of nitrogen build up in the body which is a bad thing because it can form air bubbles in the blood stream, which can kill you.
There are three charts that allow you to calculate how deep you can go if you have already dived that day and our instructor spent the time showing us again and again how to use them.
“Do you all understand?” No, I didn’t understand. The numbers and letters were all just gibberish, and I was feeling rather overwhelmed again and hoping I just wouldn’t get sick. Luckily, there are computers that calculate everything for divers better than any chart could, and we would be using them when diving, so I wasn’t too worried.
Then it was back to the pool, to practice the skills like filling the mask with water underwater and then emptying it by tilting the head upwards and blowing through the nose and practice going down again. I went down to the bottom of the pool very slowly, equalizing all the time, feeling as if I was squeezing air out of my ears, and I made it with hardly any pain at all. I felt much better by the afternoon and therefore, felt much better about the whole SCUBA thing altogether.

After the pool we had to take and pass a test to be able to continue being certified. It was multiple choice and most of the questions were easy except for the chart calculations. The instructor purposefully left the room during the test, because he didn’t want anyone to fail either. So I filled in the same circles Hendrik had filled in and passed the test.

Tomorrow we were supposed to head out on the boat and our instructor gave us his sales pitch about owning your own mask and how better SCUBA diving will be with your own. It was true that it is more comfortable with your own equipment and you have a better chance of it not leaking. Plus we wanted to buy snorkeling gear for our trip anyway and figured we might as well invest in something that’s quality and has a lifetime guarantee, as I was told I’ll never again have to buy a mask and snorkel even if it breaks no matter if I stomp on it on purpose.

Right away Cairns reminded me of Florida. An unnecessary amount of sprawl, two lanes for every road and brightly lit shops filled with tourist trinkets. Tourists in their khakis eat overpriced, not so great food, and fall into tourist traps. We were glad we had a five day scuba diving course ahead of us because we would not know what to do with ourselves in Cairns otherwise, but then again we wouldn’t be there for so long otherwise. I was super excited but also nervous about learning how to dive. We had to get up bright and early for the lessons so I decided to have a coffee in the morning, before going to the diving center. I thought the milk was sour because it tasted rancid, but I didn’t think too much of it since Hendrik had one too and he didn’t seem to think it was bad.

I soon forgot about the coffee as I began to sign my name over and over again on forms for the diving school. Then we were told all about the dangers of scuba and the possible injuries such as lung expansion, the bends, and suffocation. I felt quite woozy after that but decided I was just really nervous. Come lunchtime I ate my sandwich not out of hunger but because I thought I had to eat.

We started off in the pool, where we had to take a swimming test. I swam around the pool no problem but since I did not have goggles, the over chlorinated water irritated my eyes so much that I couldn’t see clearly or open them properly for the rest of the day which was really handy when I had to learn how all the equipment fits together and how to use it.

By the end of the lesson after we learned some skills in the shallow end we were finally allowed to go to the bottom of the four meter pool. Everyone disappeared under the water and I tried to do the same but my ear wouldn’t equalize no matter how hard I blew into my pinched nose. As I went deeper the pain increased and I had to go back up. I forced myself to back down and swam around a bit even though my ear was still in pain.

I was relieved when it was over and I could climb out of the water, and that’s when I felt all the weight. To add to an aluminum tank I had a weight belt around my waist too so I would sink. It was wonderful to take it off, but I was shaking, I couldn’t see, and my ear hurt. Luckily the instructor picked my equipment to dismantle as show so I didn’t have to bother putting anything away and just went to change.

I felt nauseous before I got into the van to go back to town, so I sat in the front. As we neared our destination I didn’t think I’d make it. Then the van came to a halt and the instructor began to tell us about tomorrow. I just got out closed the door and puked on the Cairn’s street. Right in front of the whole van so everyone in my class had a front row view.

I left ASAP and went straight to bed and spent the whole day sleeping as my body purged itself. I was embarrassed, miserable, and absolutely terrified of diving. I didn’t think I’d go diving again and tried to convince Hendrik to go without me.